Skip to main content

Breaking Curfew

This Sunday March 4th at midnight will mark the beginning of my first self-imposed “vow of silence”. My goal is to go without speaking for 24 consecutive hours - every week - for as long as possible.

In preparation, I advised my family who was not terribly disappointed to hear that I would be holding my tongue. They did seem to think that it will be difficult for me though.

I for one, CANNOT WAIT!

The idea came to me after two specific events. First, a friend asserted that I should be spending more time in prayer and meditation. Second, after spending several hours in silence “by accident”, I was struck by how disruptive it was to “speak” again. This made me realize the extent of the peacefulness that being silent had created.

It isn’t all that surprising when you think about it. For most of us, speaking involves a lot more than just opening one’s mouth and pushing air past one’s vocal chords. Ideally (although sadly, not always) there is some thought that precedes it, the expression of which can require a great deal of mental and emotional energy. Words are cumbersome tools to wield but unfortunately they are still the generally accepted currency of communication.

Not to mention that, unless you are wearing a “Vow of Silence” badge, you are exposed to other people deciding that they need information from you NOW. You will naturally feel obliged to respond, regardless of your desire or ability. While answering a question may seem harmless enough, it is important not to underestimate the amount of effort that goes into listening, understanding and formulating a response - all before you even open your mouth.

Speaking also exposes you to a wide range of potentially disruptive responses. Take the seemingly inoffensive question “What’s for supper?”. Most of the time I don’t even know the answer to this question which already disturbs my calm significantly. If by some miracle I do happen to know what is for supper, I then hesitate to answer as I anticipate all the possible reactions, most of which are unpleasant. Even before I open my mouth to answer I am exhausted. How lovely to just be able to point to my “Vow of Silence” button and save myself the trouble once in awhile!

Have you ever noticed the surge of cortisol (stress hormone) that your adrenal cortex releases when your telephone rings? Of course you have! I have also observed that this reaction is elicited, in varying degrees depending on my level of concentration, simply by my attention being called by an outside source. Cortisol is a major player in the fight or flight response, a phenomenon with which we are all too familiar.

A much lesser known but equally natural phenomenon is the “Relaxation Response”, as elaborated by Dr. Herbert Benson of Harvard Medical School in his book of the same title. He discovered that our bodies are ALSO HARDWIRED TO RELAX when we feel safe. In other words, your body comes equipped with the knowledge of how to deeply relax given the right circumstances (think of the exquisite feeling one experiences right before falling asleep). It is this natural physiological response that I aim to elicit with my 24 hours of silence. For now, all I hope to “achieve” is a more peaceful body. The rest of it (peaceful mind, peaceful planet etc.) can wait.

I leave you with the beautifully wielded words of Hafiz:

CURFEWS

Noise
Is a cruel ruler

Who is always imposing
Curfews,

While
Stillness and quiet
Break open the vintage
Bottles,

Awake the real
Band.

Popular posts from this blog

Making Friends with Uncertainty

I am sure that most of you will agree with me that in life there is much uncertainty. For starters there is the uncertainty that exists between ourselves and the outside world. We are usually bursting with questions to which we don’t naturally possess the answers. For example, we wonder whether the bus we are waiting for will be on time or whether there will be a table at our favorite restaurant when we arrive without a reservation on Friday night. Of course, there are bigger uncertainties than these. Ever plucked the petals off of a daisy while chanting “he(she) loves me, he(she) loves me not”? I thought so. You, me and the rest of the planet friend! There is also the uncertainty that exists between you and yourself. In this case, the answers to your questions are already within you but they can be hidden from view. A good example of this level of uncertainty is the difficulty many of us have answering the seemingly simple question “What Makes Me Happy?”. This is the kind of unc...

Getting Traction

How have the past few days living in a world transformed by a coating of ice affected those of you living here in southern Quebec? The most striking complication is how difficult it has become to physically move about. Walking is much slower and each step is more cautious, more tentative. Maybe you have even completely lost your footing and ended up on your ass. Walking is a great example of a simple task that becomes significantly more demanding - of both attention and energy - when you have no traction. And good luck opening (or closing) the car door when you have no solid ground to stand on. The frictionless world in which we have found ourselves over the past few days illustrates the importance of "getting traction" in order to execute even the simplest of tasks. As usual, what is happening in our outside environment can teach us a valuable lesson about our inner environment. When we talk about "being grounded" or "centred", I believe that we a...

Two Small but Incredible Examples from the Past Week

My last blog was an anthem to letting go of expectations and sitting in a place of patience in order to receive ALL of the wonderful things that are in store for you regardless of the source, including information. Here are just a couple of examples of two surprising yet perfect ways in which information that I needed flowed to me since I wrote that a week or so ago. I was shopping at a local bookstore for a specific book to offer as a birthday gift. Since it is a popular title I was able to find it quickly on the shelves. Given my tendency to lose myself in a book store I was very satisfied with the efficiency of my errand thus far. The book was on the bottom shelf so I bent down to grab a copy. As I lifted it fluidly from its place on the low shelf I did a double take as there was somehow a second, and different, book sliding off the shelf at the same time. After a few startled seconds I realized that it had been “abandoned”, placed horizontally on top of the 5 or so copies ...